Sunday, May 16, 2010

A friend of mine

Tonight, I realised how much pain human beings can inflict upon each other just by a few words, a few sentences. It doesn't matter if it is over the phone, the internet or over a third person. It's still pain, and one way or the other, one person always end up getting hurt.

I have a friend.
I have a couple of friends, but I'll tell you about this particular friend tonight.

See, my friend is this chirpy, happy person in general. She laughs like a maniac, and can't stop laughing once she starts. She's a "ranga" (a redhead), but a very beautiful one. From inside out. And I'm not making it up. To me, she's always been beautiful. She has flaws, like the next person, but I've learned to put up with her Justin Bieber antics, and let her be infected with the "Bieber Fever". She's one of those people that you'll just smile hanging out with her.

And tonight, my friend just got deeply hurt. Over Formspring, people had posted very, very nasty things about her. Things that I don't want to repeat. Things that she can't ignore. And when I say nasty, I mean really bad things. The kind that can hurt people a lot. And my friend is very sensitive. I mean, if another person would've said those things, I would've been upset too. With her, she took it very seriously - even up to the point where she believed the things they said. It took me a while to reassure her that none of it is true, and eventually she believed me.

While reassuring her, I wanted to ask her to "not take it seriously", "let it go" or "don't let them get to you". I wanted to say it, but couldn't. Because I've been through this. I had been called horrible things before. It didn't seem right to tell her that, when I know that at where she was, at that very moment, it would feel like a bunch of crap. And it was. So I just told her what I knew. Things I hope would make her feel better, but meaning every single word I said.

I've asked her to go to sleep and not think about it too much, and she's said 'okay'. For some reason, I think she'll agonize over it. And that's the reason I can't sleep tonight. I'm worried. I know she'll be okay, but there's a part of me that's worried. I feel.. uneasy. If it's this hard on me, I can't imagine what's she going through.

For now, I'll keep myself pre-occupied. I still have an essay to write. A project to finish. A music piece to compose. It's almost dawn, so I better get a move on. It's going to be a long night tonight.

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